The Process 18 Steps
The Completion Process is a comprehensive approach to healing core traumas that recur as emotional triggers that prevent us from living empowered lives free of fear. The Completion Process is an 18 step visualization that walks you through an emotional trigger following the emotion to the earliest memory, then resolving the child's needs through both the mental visualization of resolution and providing awareness through the adult perspective of the events that occurred.
Create a Safe Haven
We set up a Safe Haven (safe place) in our mind, and we also create a primary “Safe Support Figure.” This has to be done only once, unless you wish to create a different kind of place at another time.
We practice Emotional Vipassana in order to explore the feeling or trigger. When we have a strong uncomfortable emotion or feeling in the present, we close our eyes and sink into the feeling. We familiarize ourselves with the unique sensations or “feeling flavor” of the feeling. We are unconditionally with that feeling, experiencing and observing it without needing it to change. After a time, we see if we can name the feeling. We can do this with ourselves regardless of whether there is a particular feeling present; it is simply
Validate the Present Feeling
We give the emotion or feeling the message that we are completely with it, that we see it as valid, that we care about it, and that we are ready and want to know what it has to say. We are open to fully receiving it.
Invite the Memory to Surface
We use the sensations of the “feeling flavor” like a rope connecting us to the origin or causation of that very feeling. We ask, “When was the first time I felt this feeling?” And instead of mentally chasing the answer, we let our being offer it up to us like a bubble floating up from the depths of the ocean in whatever form it comes
Re-experience the Memory
If/when a memory surfaces, we observe and experience the memory in whatever way it comes to us. We take time to be present with the intensity of the feeling of the memory. We emotionally re-experience it.
Validate the Feeling within the Memory
We give the emotion in the past (same as we did when it was present tense) the message that we are completely with it, that we see it as valid, that we care about it, and that we are ready and want to know what it has to say. We are open to fully receiving it.
Step into Adult Perspective within the Memory
When we feel ready, we step out of the perspective we are currently in (such as first person) within the memory and step into the perspective of our current adult self within the memory. In other words, we move from passively witnessing the memory to active visualization.
Validate the Child’s Emotions.
We comfort and show affection and unconditional, focused presence to our child self in the scene with one prerogative in mind, validation of the child’s emotions. We give the child the message that it is right and OK to feel how they feel, and we give the child permission to fully feel how they feel. If we feel unequipped to do this, we bring our Safe Support Figure from the Safe Haven into the scene to do this for our child self.
We wait for the child self in the scene to naturally move in the direction of relief (keeping in mind the child selves may just need you to prove that you will be there for them forever, just as they are).
Call Back Other Fractured Aspects of Self
We “call back” any other fractured aspects of the self that are present in that one scene and lovingly merge them into the core child self, so we are only dealing with one child self.
Meet the Child’s Needs within the Memory
When and if the child feels validated and is ready to move forward emotionally, we take action to find a resolution to the situation at hand. This is where creativity and individuality are important. We must find out what need is not being met and meet it. We can say things to our child selves that make them feel good. We can stand up for our childhood selves. Give suggestions and take suggestions but, ultimately, trust yourself (or the person doing the process) to know what is needed to alter the circumstance. Above all, trust the child self in the scene to know what he or she wants and needs.
Choice to Stay or Go
When a feeling of relief has occurred as a result of taking action to change the circumstance in the memory, we give the child the choice to stay in the memory/visualization or to come to the Safe Haven.
Check for Completion
If the child chooses to stay, we ask the child why he or she wishes to stay, we respond accordingly, and we repeat Steps 10–12 if necessary before bringing the process to a close. As we repeat the steps, we check again for any more nonintegrated, fractured aspects of the child self that might still be stuck in the memory. If we find any, we merge them into one child self and ask again. We trust the child to know what is right for him or her, and we meet all of the child’s needs within the context of the memory. If the child wants or needs someone to stay, we leave an aspect of ourselves or our Safe Support Figure there with our child self. If the child chooses to go to the Safe Haven, the child is brought to the Safe Haven.
Enter Safe Haven and Deactivate the Memory
Coming into the Safe Haven, the memory the child was taken out of is then closed (for example, shrunk or popped like a balloon).
Create Purification and Healing
Place the child (or children) in the healing water, and bathe him or her as a purifying and healing ritual for entering into the Safe Haven. The child drinks the water as well. This symbolically ends the previous life in the memory so that the child can begin a new life here in the Safe Haven.
Meet the Child’s Needs within the Safe Haven.
The child’s needs and wants are met within the context of the Safe Haven to the degree that the person doing the process feels as if the session is complete.
Option to Stay or Merge.
The child is given the choice to stay in the Safe Haven or to rejoin and merge with the adult perspective. If the child chooses to stay, lovingly embrace and support that choice. If the child chooses to merge, we imagine the child merging with our adult perspective and becoming a part of us, like a puzzle piece going back into place.
Return to Conscious Perspective
We return to conscious perspective, taking at least a few deep breaths as we bring our consciousness back to real time. And we gently take time to re-acclimate to the sharpness of our surroundings and the new level of integration and presence that we feel. We need to be